Miss V

pHformula

Thu, 10 Jan 2019 10:16:43 GMT

Having undertaken the pH resurfacing treatments some months ago (see resurfacing blog), Miss V bites the bullet and gives herself over totally to pH formula. No messing, no dipping in and out and no wandering off the pH path. The journey to good skin is a bumpy one (no pun intended) but six months later we catch up with her to see if the pH potions have worked the magic she’d hoped for……..

Youth, they say is wasted on the young and as the years tick by this is one middle-aged lady my darling Vaulties, who wishes she could leap back in time and teach my smug, elastic skinned teenage self just how easy it is to achieve fab, glowing skin.

You see, my skin today is a zillion times more peachy and delectable than that my spot-prone, pasty skinned self endured through most of the 1990s and early 2000s.

Try as I might, clear, glowing skin was as elusive as flattering fashion to my young self and my younger years were plagued with a face full of spots combined with sore dry patches.

Obviously my confidence took a massive battering and I was left longing not for a date with Simon Le Bon like the rest of my contemporaries, but for just one day when I could leave the house without inch thick concealer or a bucket load of Oxy10 .

As the years ticked on the spots subsided but my skin stayed quite ‘angry’ and seemed determined to trip me up, should I have ever decided to forgo my strict make up essentials – oily in places, dry in others; red in patches and really quite sore my skin was a pain in both sense of the word.

This was the way my skin was……..or so I thought……… for last year as you already know, during my 47th on this earth I stumbled across the visage-changing, answer to all my skin woes – PH Formula.

It’s not sexy, you don’t get a free gift, it won’t make Simon Le Bon fall in love with you and the packaging is a bit……dare I say, boring (shhhhhhhhhhhhhh!) BUT (and it’s a big one) it does exactly what it says on it’s rather tedious, scientific looking packaging– it straight up, bang on, smack-me -in-the-face-with-a-spade, WORKS!

By sticking with the regime (detailed below, but you’ll need your own prescription worked out for you by The Vault as everyone’s skin is unique) and combining the products with some in-salon treatments, my skin slowly lost it’s thick, pore enlarged, porridgey appearance and has developed the kind of glow and health that I honestly only ever thought was achievable with a ton of make up, soft candle light and a good instagram filter.

Lines are finer, wrinkles are diminished and my skin is finer and firmer than it’s been in years – I take that back, than it’s been EVER!

These products are as accessible as they are efficient (they are no way near as expensive as some of the bigger more well known brands) and their no-nonsense approach (and packaging!) is dedicated to simply improving the skin you're in (it changes or resurfaces; taking away the bad and building on the good)

I honestly think everyone should take the PH Challenge (both my mum and my teenage daughter are converted – totally different skin types at totally different stages in life and both would give me up before they’d throw the PH away!) Give it six months and with a bit of dedication (DO NOT use anything else, however pretty the packaging) you too will be beyond happy with the skin you’re in; and that after all ladies, is the best place to be.

Science bit (as I know some of you like this – also helps when explaining why you need to buy PH Formula and not the skincare on offer at Ocado!)

“Developed as a dermatological skin resurfacing system, pHformula successfully treats skin disorders like premature ageing, hyperpigmentation, acne and chronic redness.
pHformula is taking skin resurfacing to the next level, by introducing an “outside in” and “inside out” philosophy. Advanced dermatological skin resurfacing procedures working from the outside in, combined with powerful skin nutrition, working from the inside out provide the skin with the full benefits assisting in rapid skin restoration. “

My Prescription: Exfo Cleanse day and night, AGE Recovery every day, Vit C serum day & night, ACTIVE every night

* PS. I have just started with Vitamin A Cream, Hydra and Mela serums which feel amazing!

Lipoglaze Fat Freezing

Sat, 24 Mar 2018 17:46:25 GMT

Sooooooooo not so sure about this one – sucking areas of my body (which usually I’d fight to keep covered at ANY cost) with some kind of fat-freezing machine? Not only do I find these ‘quick fix’ solutions pretty unbelievable, I’m really not up for anything that involves temperatures below zero.

Let me explain dear Vaulties - the cold and I are not friends – I’m a sun-child! I don’t believe there’s such a thing as ‘too hot’ and I’ll happily toast my bits and bobs for as many hours as the sunshine feels able to shine! Therefore, the idea of volunteering to actually be frozen using the new Lipoglaze treatment isn’t the most appealing.

“Why would you do that??” I hear you cry……… well, I’ve been given the chance to get rid of the bane of my life.

We’ve all got area of the body that jumps out and mocks us each time we glance in a mirror and for me it’s a small expanse of wobbliness below my bra strap and above my jeans that I’d love to describe in more delicate terms but in reality is the ultra unglamorous and most dreaded BACK FAT!

However, even though the reward is my most desired, body-improving dream the reality of Lipoglaze is still daunting and it’s with a certain amount of trepidation that I wait to be called into the treatment room.

“What are you having done?” a friend of a friend asks as she sits unaware, flicking through mags.

“Ermmm Lipoglaze fat freezing,” I mumble, looking out of the window and trying not to puke with nerves.

“What??” she spluttered “You’re having what? Fat frozen – How? Where? Why?”

All eyes in the salon swivel my way and I feel myself rambling incoherently about the process I’m about to embark on.

“I’ve got this little tiny bit of unhappy fat which will be PAINLESSLY frozen to minus one degree and after a certain amount of time will melt effortlessly from my body, leaving me slinky-backed and fabulous,” I ramble, looking at my feet.

The salon is stunned into silence.

“Errrrrrrr where does the fat go?” a voice by the sinks whispers.

“YES!” bellows the friend of a friend as her hairdryer starts to whir – “Good question; where does it go?? If it’s frozen does it just fall off your body like a giant fat-berg?!”

Squeals of laughter follow my terrified, fat-berg traumatised self as my smiling therapist, Kara, emerges to lead me into the tranquillity of the treatment room.

As with all these things the thought of it is so much worse than the actual process….

After fending off a panic attack and pushing all thoughts of ice-cube shaped lumps of frozen fat-berg being torn from my body, Kara busied herself prepping my back as she calmed me down.

“Noooooooooooooo!” she laughed. “You will not be leaving with a little bag of fat-bergs! It’s totally non invasive and you’re not going to notice anything other than the fact in a few weeks time you WILL look and feel slimmer.”

This promise of smoothed out lumps and bumps was enough to have me jumping on to the bed, whipping my jeans off and quickly pointing out the offending areas.

I’m not in bad shape for an old bird edging ever nearer to 50 and whilst Bikram yoga and a pretty healthy diet sorts out most of my problems, I’ve always had trouble shifting the fatty pad at the bottom of my back – cutely and utterly ironically tagged ‘Love-Handles’

“You’ve just about enough here to work with,” Kara explained (you need to have enough fat to be treated – it’s the only time you’ll be thankful your bumps are big enough to bust!) “You’re going to see a brilliant result and it will definitely enhance your overall shape.”

Bracing myself as she placed a gel infused pad (protects the skin from the freezing temperatures) on my back I waited in anticipation as the Lipoglaze machine pads were placed on my back and the sucking and freezing began.

It’s cold, it’s different, it’s most definitely odd but you couldn’t even call Lipoglaze uncomfortable let alone painful. I lay happily for 45 minutes answering texts and emails without even a flinch at the icy magic happening on my back.

After a quick massage from Kara, I was left with two red, cold marks and a sense of excitement at the thought of my impending bump free silhouette.

So how does is work? Basically, the offending fatty part of your body is cooled down to the extent that cells get frozen and dissolved, from where they can be naturally excreted from your body. It’s totally non-invasive, tightens, tones and most importantly blasts wobbles without the need of the bashing off of a single fat-berg!

“So?........has it worked?” Yes! Yes and YES! Without any to change to my usual exercise and diet regime in just 4 weeks I’ve lost a neat 1.5 inches and my waist/lower back area is definitely more defined - the love handles gone in a puff of lipoglaze! You get ultimate results at 12 weeks so Kara is confident my results will just get better and better.

It’s a remarkable machine which has truly left me in a bit of a daze – the results are pretty staggering.

I have to admit to being more than a little bit sceptical before I did this – a machine that melts fat away in just one 45-minute, painless session seems too good to be true – but it really is just that…totally true and utterly, utterly brilliant.

Although you could in theory treat your whole body treated (they even have a small suction pad for any annoying chin wobbles) realistically, your best thinking of Lipoglaze as a final secret push on those stubborn areas – love handles, bingo wings, turkey neck (jeez who comes up with these monikers!) will all melt quickly and painlessly away.

I’m such an advocate that I’ve returned for another session on my tummy and the little wobble under my chin (you can have two areas zapped at once – can this machine actually get any better??) ; if the results are anything like the tightened, taut results of my shrunken love handles then I’ll be setting up my own personal shrine to Lipoglaze (I’ll keep you posted)

I can’t say enough about this genius treatment – cold has never felt (or looked!) so good!

pHformula Skin Resurfacing

andrewmacdb@gmail.com (Miss V. ) — Sun, 05 Mar 2017 14:56:46 GMT

Want to look younger? Read on...

I wish I listened more.

I was useless in the classroom, pathetic during job inductions and can honestly say would never survive a plane crash as have never, ever, even once for just a little bit listened to what the air stewardess says about putting on your life jacket if mid air drama occurs.

It is a problem that once again I fear may have got me in trouble. Maybe then the words “…..and then you can come back for your first skin resurfacing” wouldn’t be keeping me awake at night trying to piece together the proceeding conversation! ☺

Let me explain my predicament dear Vaulties…….. So, clutching a coffee, Grazia and a huge pair of sunglasses I popped into The Vault the other day to moan about the ruddy awful condition of my skin. Yes it was looking tight and non-lined (thank you darling Dawn and the elixir of youth that is Sculptra ) but I felt dull, drab and had pores so large I honestly think I could use them as a purse.

Kara and Jess didn’t seem phased and told me they’d sort me out in no time thanks to the amazing results of the pHformula products they use.

This is where things get sticky.

I know Kara told me about the products I was to apply as I vaguely remember her holding them up to me, and I know Jess mentioned that these ‘advanced pharma-cosmeceutical creams and procedures’ would give me back the kind of skin I’d last seen in my 20s (you don’t forget that kind of stuff eh ladies??!!) but other than that I really can’t kind of remember!

So here I am clutching a bag of products looking in the mirror wanting to weep at my grey, ghoulish pallor with Kara’s words ringing in my ears: “first…skin….resurfacing”.

What is coming next dear reader?? Who knows? All I know is these products smell delicious (sort of medical and serious but flowery and kind at the same time), that I’m to use a cleanser, an active product and a Vit C moisturiser twice a day and that I’m to return in a month.

Gulp! Here goes nothing – except (even though I can’t remember I trust pHformula and The Vault to the ends of this beauty-seeking earth) a firm adios to my depressed looking, porridge coloured skin!

Shut the front door! Cheese on bread! OMG!

It doesn’t matter that I don’t listen, it doesn’t matter that I didn’t know what I was doing, it doesn’t even matter about the slightly scary, a tad ominous “first skin resurfacing” comment – PHFORMULA ROCKS!!!

Having meticulously applied the three-step-process (cleanser, active cream, Vit C) morning and night for a month I am gobsmacked at the change in my skin.

I’m not exaggerating when I say that I could honestly see a difference in just two days and having tried just about every high end, youth-searching serum/cream on the planet this is not a claim I make lightly (the other brilliant thing with these products is they’re purse friendly – mid priced and good sized).

As a bit of a label snob when it comes to creams I slap on my fizzgog (stupid I know, but I tend to think the more expensive it is the better it must be) I wasn’t expecting much but ended up being blown away by these products.

Bouncing into The Vault expecting to be showered with compliments about my dewy complexion, Kara merely looked up, showed me through to the divinely comfortable beauty bed and said: “Now we’re going to give you the skin you’ve dreamed of!”

And they only bloomin’ did!

This was the ‘skin resurfacing’ bit I’d been fretting about. But unlike the old days when you were left with a sore, red face and the look of a snake shedding it’s outer epidermis, things have thankfully moved on. Way on.

The A.G.E skin resurfacing treatment (I was up for combatting age but you can battle other skin problems such as hyperpigmentation, acne and rosacea with the tailored pH treatments) is VERY effective but doesn’t leave you looking like a peeling, painful mess.

It was at this point, for the first time in forever I actually listened (something this good deserves the reference of lending one’s ear!)

Basically the resurfacing kick-starts your cells to regenerate in the different layers of the skin (did you know there’s six layers??? See Kara, I do listen!!) whilst at the same time reducing any inflammation and trauma to your face – simply amazing.

So what did it involve? Well, a chemical (the ‘resurfacing’ part) was washed over my skin and left until it started to slightly sting (nothing too uncomfortable so don’t panic – like ants with hot feet walking across your cheeks!), then a Vit C booster is pushed into your skin with a roller holding tiny pins (it's called micro needling apparently) and finally a cooling mask was then applied (just lovely)!

Yes! I did say tiny pins!!!! Did this hurt? Hmmmmmmm a bit like having your face rubbed gently with a cactus I’d say – I’d definitely say it ‘tingled’ but I’ve been know to take time off work for period pain or a paper cut (my friend Loopy also had the treatment at the same time and scoffed at my cactus description; but she’s hard. Proper hard. If she lost a limb, she’s stick a plaster on it and still make spin! So I’d go with somewhere in between – not painful but not painless!)

Who cares though because the results are simply unbelievable.

I don’t want to sound all evangelical and preachy here but this treatment really is life changing.

I’ve never had skin as good as this – so clear, so dewy, peachy and absolutely pore free and it truly changes your confidence levels.

Talking to other ladies who are having the treatment for acne prone skin or rosacea it is an emotional club to join – pHformula really does change faces and having actually seen the unbelievably positive difference it has made to mine and so many others skin; I’d be so bold as to say that when it comes to holding your head high it could even change your life.

Sculptra Collagen Treatment

andrewmacdb@gmail.com (Miss V. ) — Fri, 06 Jan 2017 11:52:27 GMT

I have a secret. So big, so glorious I’m chewing my lip and contemplating whether or not to share it. Not because it’s in anyway contentious or litigious but because it’s so ruddy brilliant I sort of want to keep it to myself………

However, Miss V is all about sharing fellow Vaulties so draw closer, lend me your ear and prepare to discover the holy grail of all beauty treatments – the elixir of eternal youth!

Now I‘ve dabbled with Botox, I’ve even had the odd bit of plump put in my luscious lips but I’ve always erred on the side of caution with fillers and injectables; with names I cannot pronounce and results that seem to vary from permanently terrifying to scare-you-children shocking.

So, dear reader it was with a certain amount of trepidation that I sat down in one of The Vault’s big comfy beauty chairs to discuss va-va-vooming my face with the glorious Dawn Jasper.

I might add I am utterly in love with the wonderful D.Jasper; she calmed my hysterical self in seconds, didn’t put up with any of my unnecessary nonsense and is so professional and charming that I would have let her carry out a full face lift there and then!

However, I digress dear reader – I sense your impatience……..what is this fountain of youthful solace you discovered Miss V? I hear you cry!

Right, well…. It’s called (lowers voice and speaks in a whisper ;-) ) Sculptra.

Such a simple word, such an unassuming group of vowels and consonants which lilt off the tongue in such a simple way – yet the product under the name possesses the greatest and most wonderful of all powers – the ability to turn back time!

So how does it work? Unlike other skin plumping injectables which put a substance into your face to immediately puff out lines and creases, Sculptra uses a poly-L-lactic acid to stimulate your own collagen! Therefore rather than having a foreign substance placed in your dermis, Sculptra kick starts your own collagen into doing its job again converting you back to your youthful self again!

So that’s the science bit at its most basic level (for a more in-depth journey into Sculptra go and talk to the Dawn – she can ally any fear and truly is a absolute encyclopedia of knowledge on how and why this amazing product works)

Now down to the nitty gritty – having had a few pics taken of my slightly droopy, sad looking 45-year-old face I begged Dawn to get going!

She explained she would lay the sculptra a long my cheek bone and to do this would run a thin cannula under my skin to evenly distribute the wonder-product.

I am pathetically squeamish and a total wimp but was assured I wouldn’t feel any pain thanks to some super strong numbing cream.

So was it painful? I can honestly, from the bottom of my heart say not in the slightest. Not even a tiny bit. You can feel the drag slightly as it’s distributed but the feeling isn’t in anyway painful; weird definitely but not remotely painful!

I was then shown a mirror! Wow WOW WOW!!

The Sculptra had given me my scaffolding back! My cheekbones were doing their job again and my whole face had been ‘lifted’

But………. I was told this was only temporary as the Sculptra takes a few weeks to get your own collagen going again and the immediate results would subside in a few days but definitely gave an idea of what to expect (the water injected with the Sculptra dissipates in a few days)

I was sent on my way with instructions to massage for 5 mins, 3 times a day for the next 4-6 weeks and to wait for the Sculptra to wok it’s magic.

And by heck did it do just that – 6 months later I can see a huge difference in my face and am a convert. My own collagen has plumped and filled and my face seems to have returned to a glory from years gone by. The result is natural and tear-inducingly wonderful, it truly is like sipping from a cup of youth juice!

I can’t praise Dawn or this product highly enough and if you’ve ever wondered how to ‘naturally’ turn back time get your own collagen working again and say hello to cheekbones you thought you’d waved goodbye to forever.

So there you have it, SCULPTRA now not so secret but so, so, so very super.

Soprano Ice Laser Hair Removal

andrewmacdb@gmail.com (Miss V. ) — Mon, 12 Dec 2016 12:19:44 GMT

Miss V – “It’s Sanity NOT Vanity!”

Keeping you abreast of all things beautiful..

So here I am and what a season to start with – it’s a cool Yule and I’m in full festive flow ……yet we all know it’s coming; get Christmas out of the way and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.

Sinking lower into your giant, winter jumper won’t help and pretending it isn’t ever going to get lighter in the evenings isn’t going to cut it either….

A bit more of winter, a blink of spring and then it’s here…….SUMMER! That glorious period of bronzed limbs, revealing bikinis, flushed cheeks and Bellinis is looming like an annoying spotlight on pasty-white, hairy bodies! I know it feels like you’ve only just donned the 80 denier, given up looking at your naked body and thought “to hell with the diet”!

Jeez, even writing about being ‘beach-ready-body’ makes me want to grab a box of Celebrations and lay on the sofa with a cushion on my head, whimpering slightly whilst drooling melted chocolate and semi-consciously ignoring the warmer air outside.

However, not this year Vaulties! Miss V is getting ready …. I’m going to meet those warmer months bang on, full frontal, show-me-the-rays, body confident! This year sun, you’re not going to be the only thing ready to SHINE!

But…..I realise, I need some help!!!

Standing in front of a long mirror as nature intended, I open one eye long enough to take in skin the colour of tinned rice pudding and hair…..wow, hair…let’s just say Chewbacca would be jealous.

So this is what I’m tackling first in my “stand up to summer campaign” – the body blanket that seems to have grown over my body during the past few winter months! Comfortable and practical? Yes. Beautiful and alluring most definitely not! It’s got to go and so I hotfoot it down to The Vault to tap into their scare hair tactics.

Hair (not the stuff on my head I might add, that doesn’t seem to have got the “grow as fast and as thick as you can” memo the rest of my body got) is the bane of my life.

Shaving if I’m honest does my head in (patchy, bleeding limbs are never a good look) so I put myself in therapist Jess’s hands for an underarm Soprano Ice Hair Removal session.

I’m not keen on doing this – I’ve had laser for hair before and it really, really ruddy hurts!! Like a hideous and prolonged attack of twanging elastic bands all over your body. I’d managed 40 seconds previously before sobbing and storming out just as hairy as before (except for a small, round, red-raw patch on my left shin.)

But in the name of Miss V I follow Jess into the therapy room and we begin……..

“I’m very sensitive,” I tell her

“It won’t hurt.” she assures.

“Can you turn it off if I cry?” I ask

“It won’t hurt.” she says again.

“I think my skin is thinner than most…” I panic

“It won’t hurt.” she repeats.

“Maybe we should give it a week to grow a bit?” I bleat.

“I’ve finished.” she chirps!

And she had! J

It honestly hadn’t vaguely, slightly, even a little bit caused me any pain whatsoever - I’ve had jeans cause me more discomfort and if I could liken it to anything it was a bit like having a warm, roll-on deodorant rubbed on your pits! It’s all to do with the special ice cooling technology but who cares about the science - IT DOESN’T HURT!

Relaxing isn’t an adjective I’d usually associate with laser hair removal but this is sublime – I actually felt pampered by the end of the session (so much so that I then panicked it hadn’t worked. However, dear reader a couple of weeks down the line my fluff is finer, my armpit smoother and all that after only one session!)

Soprano Ice is an absolute revelation and as The Vault is the only place in Kent to offer this futuristic hair blasting service, get your hairy self down there asap and free yourself of annoying fuzz forever – this time it’s all the gain with NO pain!

Stick it on you Christmas list forthwith!